


If Only For A Day

by chberry



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Violet Evergarden (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending, Letters, Parallels, Sayaka is oblivious, between kyoko and violet, fluff?, help these two, kyoko doesn't know how feelings work, kyoko is clueless, kyoko is oblivious, like actually it's bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:15:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23680654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chberry/pseuds/chberry
Summary: Kyoko Kirigiri never knew how to express her feelings in an efficient manner, so she goes to see the country’s renowned auto-memory doll, capable of filling a page with a person’s innermost emotions.
Relationships: Kirigiri Kyoko/Maizono Sayaka
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	If Only For A Day

**Author's Note:**

> I've only watched the Violet Evergarden anime, so please forgive me if some details don't match up completely.

Kyoko let out a small breath as she looked up at the brick building towering before her. The scenery of the area was just that. Scenery. But recently, everything had a second side. A side so beautiful, Kyoko couldn’t think of living without it.

It wasn’t like her. She wasn’t reliant on anything. Her whole life revolved around departing lives. It wasn’t like her to be attached. But everything changed when she met _her_. Who encompassed beauty itself. She was youth, she was heart, she was purity, she was _everything_. The gentle wind that kept the seasons moving. The smell of flowers in the springtime. The blood rushing through Kyoko’s own body, keeping her grounded, keeping her alive, keeping her sane.

All of that, from one girl. _Sayaka Maizono_. Even her name was pretty. It was dance, it was bright, it blossomed, it was a garden. A garden of love. It was _lovely_.

Kyoko shut her eyes. It would’ve been best to leave her, forget about her, just like everyone and everything else in her life. But trying to imagine a life without her was impossible. It was inconceivable. The mere thought of Sayaka being gone created a void in her soul. It was unbearable. Her heart clenched at the thought, a small pain that had once been ignored but had grown into a raging monster. Kyoko needed her feelings to get through in a way they had never before.

Kyoko had never known how to express her feelings. It wasn’t needed for her job, her family was ever distant, and she never needed to make friends. So when it mattered most, she couldn’t get her emotions out. She didn’t know how.

The building in front of her wasn’t threatening. It had a feeling similar to the one Sayaka had gifted to Kyoko. It was homely and welcoming. She brought her hand to the door handle and pushed.

A reception area, no different from that of a train station, greeted Kyoko. She walked towards the counter, before stopping in her tracks. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a sign pointing up the stairs… to her destination. She pivoted and placed careful steps before reaching the top.

A woman with long, black hair and a red outfit stopped to look at Kyoko. “Are you having some trouble?”

Kyoko looked around. “I’m looking for Violet Evergarden? Is she here right now?” 

The woman smiled. “Ah, yes. You must be her next client! Follow me!” She led Kyoko to a small desk with a small typewriter on it. “She’ll be here in a minute.”

Kyoko took a seat on a small, leather stool and waited. What was she going to say? It was troubling to sort her feelings out, let alone tell a total stranger about them. Maybe she had made a mistake. This was going to be difficult.

“Ms. Kirigiri?” A soft voice from behind her sounded. Kyoko jolted her head towards the voice, and her eyes met soft, ocean blue ones. Everything about the person standing in front of her was comforting and soft. Soft. Her smile was gentle, as was her voice and presence.

Kyoko stood up. “Yes, that’s me.”

“Please, Ms. Kirigiri, have a seat.” Kyoko obliged. “I am Violet Evergarden, and I will assist you with all my being.”

Kyoko felt her eyes widen in slight shock for only a moment. This girl couldn’t be much older than herself, but she didn’t cease any formalities.

“Shall we get started?” Violet asked, pulling her gloves off, revealing metallic fingers. Prosthetics. Kyoko wasn’t surprised, she came across all sorts of oddities in cases, and replacement limbs were common.

“I have something I’d like to say to my friend, Sayaka.” She paused, as the girl across from her hadn’t started typing. She sighed and continued. “I guess… well, I’m not really sure what I have to say.”

Violet looked up from the currently blank manuscript. She recognized the look in her client’s eyes. “Are you having trouble identifying your feelings, Ms. Kirigiri?”

“Yeah, I think. In my line of work, emotions cloud judgement often, so my family discarded them long before I was born. I never needed them, so this is quite confusing.” 

“What do you do, Ms. Kirigiri?”

“I’m a detective. It’s a family business. I got scouted by Hope’s Peak Academy for it and made friends for the first time this year.” She looked down, smiling. “I made friends with a girl named Sayaka. At first, we didn’t really talk, we would just sit in silence and eat our lunches together. Eventually, we exchanged numbers, and I started helping her with homework, and by the middle of the year we would just abandon the work and talk. She really helped me open up, and I owe her.”

Kyoko rested her palm on her cheek. “I thought the only way to get satisfaction was through solving crimes, but she showed me that human connection is just as, if not more, important. After meeting her, everything…” she looked up at Violet, “everything changed. I was able to enjoy the things of the day, like my classmates chatting, or the calmness of a street with no cars on it. It was strange, but it was fun. I want to thank her for introducing me to that feeling.”

She frowned, looking down again. “I don’t know what it’s called though. Everything I look at now has a hidden beauty that I was never aware of before. It’s… a very strange feeling, but I think I like it. Actually, I don’t think I can live without it anymore. Whenever I think about that feeling leaving me, it’s like there’s a needle aimed at my heart, and it hurts. It hurts so much. I don’t know why.”

Kyoko sighed, clenching her teeth for a moment. “I really want Sayaka to be happy too. But there’s this look in her eyes now, and I don’t know what it is, but it isn’t _happy_. It’s not what I want for her. That may sound selfish, but it’s the least I can assure for her. Oh, that’s another thing.” She paused, relishing every memory of Sayaka that made her heart skip. “I find joy in the small things in life, but she’s on a whole new level. I think… it was pretty recent that it started happening, but it’s… agh…”

Violet stopped typing. “Do you need a minute to gather your thoughts, Ms. Kirigiri?”

Kyoko shook her head. “No, I’m okay. It’s just that every time I think about her, all these happy thoughts fill my head, I think. I can’t think about anything else, just her. It’s weird, and it gets in the way of work sometimes, but it’s really the best thing I’ve ever felt. And it’s not completely mental, because I feel it physically too. In my stomach, the tips of my fingers, and my heart rate increases past my average resting heart rate. It feelings like a small tingling, and is actually quite ticklish.” 

She smiled and her cheeks flushed. One didn’t even have to look at her to know that it was happening at that moment. The description too on point, it wasn’t something someone could remember so vividly. 

“I think… I think I want to give her a hug. One that lasts for a long time, where we both feel like letting go would be the same as dying. I want that, but I don't know if she wants that. I’m not sure. I want her to want it, but I can’t force her. I don’t want to force her.”

Kyoko closed her eyes, imagining holding Sayaka in her arms, gloved hands gripping the girls arms. “Even if it’s just once, I want to hold her. Then we can just forget it ever happened and everything can go back to normal. Just once before we graduate.” She shuddered. “I can’t bear the thought of her leaving. I think it would kill me… I’m not sure what that feeling is called, but it’s dangerous and I think giving her a long hug would make it go away.”

She smiled wistfully. “Maybe I could even hold her hand. I’m sure it’s really warm and soft.” Sayaka’s hand was definitely smaller than Kyoko’s, they had even measured with their palms against each other. Maybe it was that day. When Sayaka had placed her hand against Kyoko’s scarred one without disgust, maybe she had actually placed her hand against Kyoko’s beating heart. That’s what it felt like.

“I don’t think I would’ve been able to say this if I hadn’t met her, but she reminds me of nature. She reminds me of the earth and the soil because I want to go to it eventually. She reminds me of the ocean because the sea sparkles and instills calmness and so does she. Her name means a number of wonderful things, like ‘dance’ and ‘garden,’ and she’s very breathtaking, like a field of flowers.”

“Recently, though, we haven’t been seeing eye to eye. And I think I’m slowly losing it. I can’t concentrate, and my thoughts are killing me slowly. Every time I try to look her in the eyes, those beautiful eyes of hers, she looks away. It’s so painful. It’s not her fault, she’s not responsible, but I just want to look at her and not have her look away.” She sighed. “I just—It hurts.” She placed her hand above her heart. “It hurts here. I want her to look at me. I… I want to fix everything, even though I don’t know what’s broken.”

Kyoko sighed, the gasped quietly, realizing that she had talked for longer than she ever had, putting more feeling into her speech than she thought capable. Something about that office and that girl had a welcoming, warm presence that settled itself into her brain and invited her to spill her emotions. Maybe it was the clicking of the typewriter keys, the thrum of the outside world, the saturated breeze that swept through the office. It was a welcome surprise.

“Sorry, I’ve been rambling. I think that’s all I have to say.”

“It’s quite alright, Ms. Kirigiri.” Violet smiled, an air of knowing surrounded her. She, too, had been unaware of other people’s feelings, but she had learned through her coworkers and her clients. This person so dear to her client would definitely teach her. Their connection was so strong that Violet felt it through the girl's words. And she poured those feelings into this one letter.

* * *

_Dear Sayaka,_

_You take my breath away. You were my first friend, and you’ve helped me so much. Spending my time with you has been the most enjoyable and fulfilling thing I’ve ever felt. When I’m with you, the void in my chest is filled. You’re so beautiful, you’re everything pretty, kind, gentle, and soft. I don’t know the name of what I feel towards you, but it inspires me to do amazing things._

_You mean the world to me, and I’d risk the world for you. The thought of us parting ways stabs at my soul, and I pray it never comes to be. I’d walk through hell and escape heaven to be by your side._

_I have a proposal. It may sound selfish, but I want for you to be happy. Just for one day, then never again if you don’t like it. I want to hold you in my arms. I can tell something has been bothering you, but I don’t know what it is or how to bring it up. Whenever I try to meet your eyes, there’s a sparkle, then you look away. I want you to look at me, so badly, that it’s killing me inside._

_So can you do this one thing for me? Can I gaze into your eyes, and hold you in my arms, if only for a day? Can we pretend the world doesn’t exist, that it’s only us, if only for a day? Can I look into your soul, feel your pulse by holding your hand, and feel the beat of our hearts in unison, if only for a day? Can we embrace so pristinely that letting go would be like crossing the River Styx, if only for a day? My heart clenches and my eyes water and my blood rushes when I think of you. You, the flower field to my forest. The sunshine to my rain. The nutrients to my roots. The sparkling ocean to my still sand. If only for a day, can you oblige me?_

_My best wishes to you,_

_Kyoko Kirigiri_

Sayaka put her hand to her mouth and choked back a sob. She had to find Kyoko. She needed to find her. She _needed_ to be with her.

Her heart beat so loud in her head as she raced down the stairs to the school entrance. Kyoko would be coming back from her work trip that day, and she always came to the school first after traveling. So Sayaka waited.

And she waited. The sun was beginning to set, and Sayaka began to lose hope. What if the letter had been a fake, a prank? Kyoko wouldn’t pull stunts like that, so it was her classmates? It couldn’t be, they wouldn’t do this to her, they were too—

“Sayaka?” At the mention of her name, her thoughts jumbled and stopped in their tracks. She looked up at the girl, her face inches away, eyes wide with curiosity and question.

Sayaka's dam broke, and she felt tears trailing down her face as she sniffled. “Kyoko, I-I didn’t know you felt this way about me.” She pulled the purple-clad girl into a tight embrace. “Of course I’ll oblige you. I’ll hold you forever and ever,” she cried, bringing Kyoko with her as she slumped to the ground, “because I feel the same way.” Sobs wracked her body.

She felt thin arms snake their way around her back, and Sayaka melted. She melted into a puddle of feelings and sobs, and her body shook violently, letting out all her bundled emotions. She wailed like a child holding its mother, and hugged Kyoko closer to her chest.

“Don’t ever—Don’t ever let me g-go.” She breathed through her cries. “I’ll never forgive you if you let me go.” Sayaka felt a gloved hand massage her scalp. She heard a hushed whisper, a sigh of relief. _Thank you_.

“I won’t let go, but let’s get back to the dorms. It’s late, and it’s getting cold. I don’t want you to get sick.” Kyoko stated very bluntly, but Sayaka heard the caring nature snake through. Sayaka nodded, and pulled her arms to her sides. They felt so heavy, and it was so hard to let go. Kyoko had been right. It _did_ feel like crossing the River Styx. It felt like death.

The duo made their way up to the dorms, hand in hand. It was comforting and quiet, just the two of them, like the world didn’t exist, just like the letter said. Kyoko pulled out her key, and swiftly unlocked her door. She gestured towards the doorknob, inviting Sayaka to twist it. She did, and their thoughts ran from there.

They were in a hurry. Kyoko slammed the door behind her and pulled Sayaka to her bed. She brought her arms around Sayaka’s neck, pulling her close to her chest. Sayaka heard Kyoko’s loud heartbeat, and at that moment they were one. Kyoko’s skin melted into Sayaka’s, and there was fire at every touch.

Sayaka pulled her head up. “Hey Kyoko?” She placed her lips close to the others’ ear. “Can I kiss you?”

Kyoko’s eyes widened and the tips of her ears turned red. Her heart was pounding, about to burst from her ribcage. But she settled, and turned her head so that her lips met Sayaka’s.

It was sweet, soft, caring, _loving_. The girls’ emotions melted into one kiss, one embrace, so passionate they could die. Weeks of yearning combined into one moment, a moment that lasted for all eternity, fire and fervor dancing through their skulls.

Finally they pulled away, gasping for air. Kyoko brought Sayaka to rest her head in the crook of her neck, playing with her soft, blue hair, twirling it through her fingers, massaging her scalp.

“Let’s stay like this forever. Not just one day. Forever.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave feedback if you have any!  
> I'm not experienced with writing about love, so please leave criticism!  
> And thank you again!


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